The Red Sox re-signed David Ortiz over the weekend because of course they did. He's David Ortiz. They're the Red Sox. That's how this works. If you look at the details of Ortiz's new two-year deal on Cot's Baseball Contracts, it says that he was re-signed on November 2. If you look at the Red Sox's transactions on, Ortiz didn't officially become a free agent until November 3. Ortiz re-signed with the Red Sox so fast it warped the space-time continuum.

Re-signing Ortiz wasn't just a given for the Red Sox. General Manager Ben Cherington said at the press conference announcing Ortiz's contract on Monday that it was one of the team's two most pressing concerns along with hiring a new manager -- not first base, not the outfield corners, not shortstop, not the bullpen, or rotation depth, but re-signing a 37-year-old designated hitter who played just five games in the second half of the last season due to a strained Achilles tendon.