"There are some nights late in seasons like these when you literally have to go on a hunting mission to find some type of story that will keep readers awake.

Then, you get tonight, when former bartender Tom Wilhelmsen tosses two scoreless innings before handing the ball off to substitute teacher Steve Delabar. The latter retires the side in only his second big league game, then records his first MLB victory when injury sub Luis Rodriguez belts a walkoff homer in the 12th for a 2-1 win over the New York Yankees.

Did I mention that Rodriguez -- maybe we can call him L-Rod tonight and have it mean something -- also clubbed two doubles? Or that his mother, Luisa, was in the stands, watching him play for the first time in five years? That she had only arrived in Seattle today for her very first trip into the city? That she gets a 20-day break from her job as a teacher? A job as a teacher at the same school as Delabar?

OK, I made that last part up. Couldn't resist.

But we all know Delabar taught as recently as April in Elizabethtown, KY, the place where most of the 35 to 40 text messages he'd already received postgame originated from. And that Luisa Rodriguez teaches many, many miles further south than that in the land where Hugo Chavez is king, or supreme ruler, or something like that. "