"It was still dark when Brett Myers pulled into the player's parking lot at the Osceola County Stadium last Saturday morning. The sun wouldn't be up for another hour. Myers found the Houston Astros' clubhouse and, for the first time as a professional ballplayer, pulled on the uniform of an organization other than the Phillies.

In dramatic lore, this would be the moment when he would pause to take stock of his life. Maybe he'd allow nostalgia to wash over him. Perhaps a tear would form at the corner of his eye.

That isn't Myers' style, though. So, naturally, he responded with a wisecrack instead. "It don't feel no different. It fits the same," he said with a grin after the first official workout for pitchers and catchers.

That's the pose - unrepentant smartass - that served as both his image and his camouflage during his Phillies career. But he was never as callous or uncaring as some chose to believe. And he eventually admitted that being told that he was no longer wanted left a bruise.

"It was a little upsetting, but I kind of felt it coming when they took me off the [National League Championship Series] roster," the 29-year-old said. "I knew it was going to happen, but I stuck around to cheer my teammates on as much as I wanted to say screw it at that point in time. Because I know how hard I worked to get back from my [hip] surgery. For that situation. That hurt more than them telling me I wasn't coming back.

"I was kind of ready to move on anyway a little bit. I'd been there so long. I'd given that organization everything I had. Physically and mentally, I gave them everything I had. Worked as hard as I could to try to be the best over there."

With the Phillies, he had a 3-year contract worth $25.75 million. With the Astros, he's guaranteed just $3 million this year with a mutual option for $8 million in 2011 or a $2 million buyout.

In short, he's the kind of low-risk, high-reward pitcher the Phillies said they were looking for going into the winter. With Houston, he figures to be the No. 3 starter behind Roy Oswalt and Wandy Rodriguez.

Which is a little disappointing since it means he almost certainly won't pitch against the Phillies during the opening weekend of the regular season at Minute Maid Park.

And while many players try to downplay their emotions about facing old teammates, Myers was bluntly honest about relishing the opportunity.

"That would be nice. And I'd like to stick it up their rear end. Just because, you know?" he said happily. "It's just the competitive nature. It's my old team. And I want to beat 'em. I think every guy has incentive to beat his former team. It doesn't have anything to do really with the way they treated me or anything like that. They didn't treat me bad at all. It doesn't have anything to do with that. It just has to do with being competitive and trying to kick their rear end just for the sport of it and try to have fun with it."

On the day he was formally introduced at a news conference in Houston he made similar comments. It got back to him that his remarks were not well-received in Philadelphia.

"If anybody takes that wrong I'm sorry, but that's not the way it's supposed to be meant," he said. "It's supposed to be meant that I want to kick their rear end. And they expect that. I told Ruben that. Whoever I sign with after this, if I pitch against y'all, the old movie, "Major League," my favorite one. You take the ball and fire it off the locker and go, 'Every time I pitch against you I'm going to stick it up your bleepin' bleep.' You know?

"I've always wanted to say that to somebody. In a funny way, though. Because I would think they'd know what I was talking about. I thought that would be funny. But evidently they took it the wrong way up there. People were calling me and saying, 'Why did you say bad things about the city of Philly?' I said, 'I never did and I never will.' ""