"Now I enjoy watching football as much as the next guy, unless the next guy has those crazy, flappy team flags on his car and spends the week after a Viking loss curled up in the fetal position wrapped in his Vikings Snuggie. Maybe Snuggie guy and I will never quite see eye to eye, but if there is one thing that can unite us all, it's fashion. What? Don't look at me like that. Sport provides a great outlet for the fashion-conscious fan. Wanting to braid your beard, but thought it would be a bit much for the office? Feeling empty inside since Zubaz became unacceptable in polite society? Looking for a reason to paint your face in public after your mime career dried up? All of these are possible in the world of football!

There are entire mall stores dedicated to nothing but Vikings fashion. Call it fan apparel if it makes you feel better, but when the 2010 line of NFL-licensed clothing came out, those dudes were all over it like celebutantes at a Marc Jacobs trunk sale. And who can blame them, really? Who doesn't look good in purple? And fellas, don't be shy about your love of Vikings fashion. It suits you. I've seen you at Applebee's, clad head to toe in your majestic purple finery, and I'll be honest, you've never looked better. You seemed to be emanating a certain glow from within, your posture was improved, and your breasts looked fan-tastic. "