"It seemed baffling at first, but now I know why Jose Canseco tweeted Billy Beane last week, hoping to get a shot at the A's 2012 roster. This team is right on the verge of becoming a full-blown circus, and Canseco would fit right in.

You figured that Manny Ramirez rumor was a joke, right? Hardly. Co-owner Lew Wolff told our John Shea that he wouldn't have a problem signing Ramirez, and that he's "a good clubhouse guy." Amazing. Wolff isn't merely negligent when it comes to this franchise and its rotting stadium. He's fully delusional.

Perhaps none of this should be taken seriously until Beane makes the A's interest official, but the mere thought of Ramirez is preposterous - in any uniform, at this stage of his life. He's through as a player, he's a slouch by nature, he'll quit on his team at the first sign of discord, and he carries a history of using performance-enhancing drugs. He's the four-tool travesty, quite rare these days.

Coming next: The Bearded Lady. Clowns who aren't funny. Three-legged tigers. And, you bet, Jose Canseco. As the Coliseum crowds rise dramatically from 8,118 to 11,463."