Or at least waterboarded.
Alex Rios, hello.
I was hating on Rios last weekend, just hating on him, because he played defense like an absolute dog against Boston. Among other things, Rios lolly-gagged to some hits, one of which was a dunker to right-center that allowed a runner to score from first base.
I vented on Monday, extending my hate to Kenny Williams and Ozzie Guillen, the general manager and manager, doing nothing, just standing there, endorsing Rios' heartless play, looking stupid as the stiff in center field just pantses Sox management.
To reiterate, because you can't say it enough, Rios is the biggest dog to play for the Sox in at least two decades, maybe ever. He's more aggravating than Adam Dunn because Rios could actually contribute defensively to minimize his retch-inducing offense.
And in case you missed the chance to hate on Rios last weekend, he supplied more ammunition in that humiliation against the Yankees on Wednesday night.
There was a flyball that dropped in front of a late-arriving and seemingly confused Rios. There was Rios missing the cutoff man. There was Rios jogging to first when he could've been safe if he had run hard because Derek Jeter bobbled the ball. And there was Rios' shameful act on Mark Teixeira's hit when Rios dived, missed, and then jogged toward the wall to get it. No urgency. No hustle. It's a wonder Rios didn't do the electric slide on his way to the ball.