"For the first time in his adult life, Baron Davis feels truly lost. Waves of emotions continue to crash through him, tossing him through a figurative ocean with no anchor.

His beloved grandmother, Madea, raised him from the time he was a boy until her death last week. Davis buried her Tuesday in Los Angeles and rejoined his Cavaliers teammates Thursday in Portland, Ore.

Now with the Cavs back in town to face the Clippers today, Davis is home again seeing family and preparing to see his former team while mourning the loss of one of the most important figures in his life.

''I'm kind of numb. Kind of here and there,'' Davis said. ''I'm stuck for the first time in my life. I can't draw from anything, can't think, can't find anything. There's no depth to the person, the character who I am right now.''

Davis speaks with a sadness in his eyes, a longing for the return of comfort and peace. It would've made perfect sense for Davis to remain in Los Angeles and to await his teammates' arrival this weekend, but he was ready to be with them again.

In fact, now he is anxious to return to Cleveland, to get away from it all for a bit and clear his head. All of that is ironic, of course, given the reports that swirled after the trade declaring Davis wanted no part of Cleveland or the Cavaliers.

''I can't wait to get back to Cleveland and have some peace of mind,'' he said. ''Some alone time to sit back and reflect and pick up the pieces and start over.''

In his eagerness to return to normalcy, Davis might have returned too quickly Thursday night. His left knee that had been bothering him since the start of the season feels pretty good since he took nine days off, but the rest of his body stiffened up a bit during the down time.

Before he even entered the game, Davis' back was wrapped during the opening minutes of the 111-70 loss Thursday night to the Portland Trail Blazers. He tried playing through it, but only made the back worse. He sat the entire fourth quarter with back spasms, playing just 15 minutes and scoring three points in the loss.

''You take a week off with no practice, no nothing; you go out there and you're getting bumped, you're getting pushed, you don't have the strength or balance you should have,'' he said. ''I just felt that I needed to do something to clear my head and try and take my mind off things. I jumped into a fire against a team that was hungry.''

The Cavs were woeful Thursday, falling behind 24-2 in the first quarter and trailing at one point by 44 to the Blazers. They didn't get an assist from any of their point guards and had only one assist from all their starters combined (Samardo Samuels)."