"By kickoff on Super Bowl Sunday, we will know everything there is to know about Giants quarterback Eli Manning, so we might as well get this one out of the way early:

His real name is Elisha.

Just like Elisha Cuthbert, daughter of Jack Bauer, girlfriend of Toronto Maple Leafs captain Dion Phaneuf and ex-girlfriend of nutty Sean Avery.

Elisha Nelson Manning is the youngest son of Elisha Archibald Manning, and he has lived a life of privilege. He attended the finest schools in New Orleans before following in his father's footsteps to Ole Miss. He was the most promising quarterback in the country coming out of college, and he famously refused to play for the San Diego Chargers, forcing a trade to New York and earning a reputation as a spoiled diva before he took a snap in the NFL."